The Wrong Umbrella

Readers who’ve followed changes in my garden this season (and have I given you any choice?) know that last spring I removed my hated Bradford pear (yay!!), which left my garden chairs in full sun most of the day and thus unusable most of the season.  No problem, I say to myself.  I’ll just rearrange and level the area to create space for a new umbrella.  Six weeks later it arrives and well, it does create a bit of shade, maybe enough for one of these chairs, but only if you tilt it, a feature that seemed like such a fine idea in the catalogue.  Turns out the tilt’s actually damn hard to maneuver and that’s because the umbrella’s made of solid wood, another feature that’s better on paper than in the field.

How did I make this mistake, choosing an umbrella that’s both too small and too heavy?  My first line of defense is to blame catalogue shopping.  If I’d seen the damn thing in person I like to think I’d have noticed it was rather small and heavy and chosen aluminum poles, lightweight fabric, and 9′ in diameter instead of 6.  But I can’t blame mail order shopping entirely and at the risk of wandering into Dr. Phil’s territory, here’s something I hate about myself.  In the process of ordering it I automatically and instinctively chose the cheapest one.  (I’d blame my tightwad parents but Phil would never let me get away with it.)  For another $50 I could have shaded both seats, and probably without the annoying tilt thingie.

If only I’d bought in person I might be sitting in the fine shade of an umbrella like this one on the deck of my smarter and wealthier neighbors.  It’s nice and big and made of aluminum and a lightweight fabric.  Some too-late research tells me these umbrellas cost about $800 at Smith and Hawken (ouch!) or waaay less (about $100 for a 9′ aluminum) from some fine Internet sources.

Now the last thing I ever want to do is discourage you all from buying outdoor umbrellas to shade your Adirondack chairs (okay, other types of chairs work just as well).  So now that I’ve done the research - and made the mistakes - go forth and buy.  There must be some end-of-season deals out there for bargain-hunters.   If you dare to go the cyber route, searching "outdoor umbrellas" should do the trick.